What I have been doing since I lost Poppy

Well since I lost Poppy I have been working really hard to keep on top of my life and get back on track.  I am determined to remain as positive as I can and although I have bad days, I am trying to appreciate the good ones more and more.  Losing Poppy has taught me how valuable life is, how valuable our time is and how valuable my other children are.  I feel it imperative to appreciate every single moment with my other four living children.  We have already had 2 birthdays since Poppy died just 8 weeks ago and with Christmas fast approaching too. More


Poppy’s Funeral 12th Oct 2011

We were picked up at 10:30 am by the following car, with Poppy in front in a one off car made for the funeral directors from a London Black Cab.  Her flowers were beautiful.  We drove to the chapel where our guests were waiting for us outside and just as the Celebrant arrived.  We were early as the traffic had been kind to us, so I took the time to take some pictures of Poppy in the car with all her flowers.  The guests were then ushered inside to Joe McElderry’s version of Over the Rainbow. More

My lost daughter, forever in my heart

On Thursday the 8th of September 2011 at 6pm, at only 19+3 weeks pregnant, my waters broke at home.  Scared I called the hospital who told me to come straight in.  I phoned my Doula who arrived within half an hour to take me to hospital where I was examined to confirm that it was in fact amniotic fluid.  I was transferred up to the maternity unit where I was seen by the on duty registrar to explain the situation to me. More

My late Special Saturday post = Greatest Achievements

My daughters greatest achievements are that she is developing normally according to all the health visitors standards, against the fact doctors told me she would be brain damaged and have delayed development and just this last week has begun to crawl even though her physiotherapist said that she would be unlikely to crawl and instead would bum shuffle and then walk, they said also that she wouldn’t walk till she was about 2 years old, so lets wait and see if she stuns us all again.  She is also eating wonderfully and now only has a problem with fluids.

My post for special Saturday last week. The same but different.

So my special needs child is now 8 months old and a lot has changed in our life as a family. Many things are just the same, we eat together, play together, laugh together. The main thing that has changed is having to plan for everything. If we want to go anywhere we need to know there is somewhere we can put a tube in if it comes out, somewhere suitable for tube feeding and we have to pack bags galore! More

Mental Illness and Benefits/Welfare

Many people have voiced an opinion (that I have heard), that just adds to the stigma against mental health sufferers. I wanted to write an article to help inform the misinformed about the invisible illness that can strike anyone at any time. More

Special Saturday!

Special Saturday is very much like a large family, going through similar daily struggles with our special needs children (and grown children).  Most of us understand what life raising a child with special needs is like, and for the most part it is an amazing journey and uniquely rewarding for all of us. More

My special needs child is amazing because…

  My special needs child is amazing because even when mummy is pushing a tube down her nose, past her gag reflex, makes her choke, gives her a nose          bleed…..she still gives me the biggest widest smile once it’s all over, and stares in to my eyes with her beautiful big steely green eyes with adoration and love.   More

Gastrostomy and Barium Swallow

Well Ronnie is now 6 months old and the worst fears of brain damage have been put aside (for now). Though she still cannot feed and has her NG tube in, she is developing as any other normal 6 month old. More

My angel came home finally!

Little Rowanna finally came home on the 22nd Feb 2011.  She still has her NG tube in for being fed as she is still unable to take her bottles, but besides that she is doing very well.  I’m now looking forwards to her christening which will be a joint baptism with her 3 year old big sister Violet and also looking forwards to travelling to Bournemouth to spend some time with family who have not yet got to meet Rowanna.  More

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